Honda 367

I am back in San Antonio for two week training and have been visiting my parents everyday after my training as they still live here. I looked around and noticed a lot of junk in the garage as well as all over the house. I've been working everyday after my conference is over to clean up. I've dropped off a whole bunch of stuff at the Goodwill's numerous times and even moved a refrigerator from one room to the garage.

It is kind of sad that they are not able to do a lot of things as they get older. I am here for a few days more and feel it is important for me to do whatever I can to spruce up their place. The house seemed so big when I grew up but now, it is just slowly falling apart. I just thought I share my experience and wonder if some of you are at that stage or have been through this stage already. Fortunately, my parents are still very healthy but are living more sedentary life now although they do travel extensively.

Lainey

[QUOTE=Honda 367,Apr 26 2005, 08:16 AM]

It is kind of sad that they are not able to do a lot of things as they get older.

Legal Bill

Good subject. We should all learn from our parents and make arrangements to move out when we get too old to keep up a house. I think this is a part of financial planning that is overlooked by many. I say you have a plan to sell-off or give away excess possessions, sell the big family home and move to a nice condo while you are still capable of doing these things for yourself.

Lainey

I think we are ahead on this plan so far.

A few years ago we had our "starter" home up for sale and we had a buyer. We wanted a bigger yard, more land, etc. Didn't really need/want a bigger home but that's what was out there.

Long story short, we decided it wasn't worth it to take on a bigger mortgage for a bigger house only to have to sell it in about 15 years, to move back into the kind of house we already have which is plenty big enough for two people.

We may have made some money on the bigger house when it was time to sell, but it wasn't for us.

Hopefully, we won't have to think about condo living or elderly housing for a few more years.

Defender

Yup I agree with most of the above. When Jackie's mom died it took us nearly 6 months to clean out her house.

Jackie and I have been clearing out our place over the past two years little by little. I have done so much ebaying that I am a Power Seller ! For example -- here is an auciton I have going right now:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewI...AMESE%3AIT&rd=1

here is another one:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/ws/eBayISAP...TRK%3AMESE%3AIT

and here are some that ended last week:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewI...AMESO%3AIT&rd=1

http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/ws/eBayISAP...TRK%3AMESO%3AIT

http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/ws/eBayISAP...TRK%3AMESO%3AIT

I figure why should I just dump the stuff when I can get $$ for it ?

Eliot

MsPerky

I've been through this once, when I moved my aunt up here from NC. It was exhausting clearing everything out of her house she had been in for 60 years!! She hadn't gotten rid of anything. My parents, although still in their house, have been more conscious of getting rid of stuff. I made them get a lawn service and maid service as a condition of staying there. Mentally, they are sharp, but physically wearing out.

cordycord

My parents are fortunately extremely pro-active, and active as well. Even though my dad got a hip replacement three months ago, he cleaned out his own (already clean) garage just a couple of weeks back. I ended up with a groovy picture of Dr. Ferdinand Porsche standing in front of our old 356 Cab D, with my mother in red bell-bottom pants. He had some other fun stuff as well, including a full tap and die set, neatly packed in their stock wooden box.

As for planning for the future, they decided themselves to move into a senior community, and have it written into their will how they should be cared for should a stroke or Alzheimer's take hold. One reason they are so pro-active is that my father had a terrible experience when his father got Alzheimer's. He had to be moved to progressively more restrictive housing, and just couldn't understand why. Not very fun.

ralper

My mother and father always kept everything. My father died last September and now we are helping my mother clean out her house. Her house is in an adult community, and there is no need for her to move, but we are getting rid of some of the clutter.

We've given away much of my father's clothes and shredded most of his bank statements going back to 1979. It is amazing how much "stuff" a couple accumulates in 62 years of marriage.

Liz and I seem to accumulate stuff too. Every now and again we go on a campaign to get rid of the clutter, but it accumulates faster then we can throw it out. It is amazing how much paper we accumulate.

RedY2KS2k

My mother-in-law and father-in-law reached the point where they never threw anything away, even while they were still able to get out and about and take care of themselves. There were stacks of newspapers and magazines waist-high all over the floor, etc. This happens to old people sometimes, often before they are incapacitated in any way. Perhaps it's just a generational thing: growing up during the depression deeply affected many people.

Honda 367

Thank you all for very encouraging remarks. I empathize with all of you as I see what aging is all about. There is time to gather and obviously time to scatter as well.

I just got back from my parents' house for the night. I ate dinner and I worked around the house vacuuming all the cob webs from wall and ceiling as much as I could. My Mom tried to make things I enjoyed eating when I was younger. But ofcourse I didn't have the heart to tell her that her cooking doesn't taste as good as they were while growing up.

I greased the garage door opener which previously sounded like it was about to break down and made few calls to remove water softener unit that had not been working for the past 30 years but take up a strategic space. My Dad who has never been an astute driver would be better without that thing as he can park his Lincoln better. By the end of the week, I think it is going to look a whole lot better. I fixed my Mom's music box my Dad bought from Italy a long time ago that had not been working for years.

After I took it apart and oiled it, it is working like a charm. My Dad told me to take it and give it to my wife but I told my parents that they should first ask my sister as she grew up with that sound. My sister said she will take it. It doesn't mean a whole lot to my wife but may mean a whole lot more to my sister. There is just too much to do and not enough time. We've been telling them to consider selling the house and move to a smaller space but my Mom keeps saying how she could sell the house and move into a smaller space. It will take time for my parents to come to realize perhaps that is the best course of action. Again, thank you all for your input.