Attitude and changes
#61
Thread Starter
I often go cry when I'm shopping. I hate shopping. I really don't mind grocery shopping too much since I always take a list and like to browse and see what new things are available with each season for good cooking. I guess that's another reason to go cry . . . I can't eat all the things I really like on a regular basis or I wouldn't be able to fit in my car.
#62
Registered User
I often go cry when I'm shopping. I hate shopping. I really don't mind grocery shopping too much since I always take a list and like to browse and see what new things are available with each season for good cooking. I guess that's another reason to go cry . . . I can't eat all the things I really like on a regular basis or I wouldn't be able to fit in my car.
No crying necessary!
#63
Registered User
I am not a vintage owner, and nor do I post here, but this post really caught my attention... fate?
There are MANY people who feel as you do... there doesn't seem to be any community, sense of pride, family, or resposibity for anything anymore. We are constanly bombarded with ya-hoos and idiots who's only existance seems to be to make others miserable and suffer. Blame it on whatever floats your boat at the time (government, education, parents). Nothing changes. The scum rises to the top. It makes you want the death penalty for failing to use a turn signal...
My better half who helps me deal with it by putting things in contex: you are seeing the outside of people, the results of people at the limit of their capability dealing whith what life throws at THEM. If that is their best in THAT paticular situation, what is the unseen part of their life like? How miserable they must be... Now, do you want that to have power over you? Do you want the cashier that can't count change to actually influence YOUR life? Look straight into them, see their pain. Tell them what they need (no BS- if they are a moron, ASK them if they are qulaified do do what they are doing. Tell them what they are doing wrong.) It helps you deal with the rage, and maybe will influence one of 'them' to change...
Finally, constant pain/separation from activities is really a repeated kick in the nuts. It makes dealing with anything, especially the small stuff, incredibly impossible. Google the drama triangle and don't let it control your life!
Best wishes
There are MANY people who feel as you do... there doesn't seem to be any community, sense of pride, family, or resposibity for anything anymore. We are constanly bombarded with ya-hoos and idiots who's only existance seems to be to make others miserable and suffer. Blame it on whatever floats your boat at the time (government, education, parents). Nothing changes. The scum rises to the top. It makes you want the death penalty for failing to use a turn signal...
My better half who helps me deal with it by putting things in contex: you are seeing the outside of people, the results of people at the limit of their capability dealing whith what life throws at THEM. If that is their best in THAT paticular situation, what is the unseen part of their life like? How miserable they must be... Now, do you want that to have power over you? Do you want the cashier that can't count change to actually influence YOUR life? Look straight into them, see their pain. Tell them what they need (no BS- if they are a moron, ASK them if they are qulaified do do what they are doing. Tell them what they are doing wrong.) It helps you deal with the rage, and maybe will influence one of 'them' to change...
Finally, constant pain/separation from activities is really a repeated kick in the nuts. It makes dealing with anything, especially the small stuff, incredibly impossible. Google the drama triangle and don't let it control your life!
Best wishes
#64
Chronic pain is tough. (Like I'm telling you anything, Val.) I guess most everyone here has had stretches of it so I think we all sympathize with what you have had to go through to and can understand how it might make you a bit edgy when it comes to dealing with the foolishness of others. Doesn't really matter, you'll always be the Val we love. Like Betty Boop, you have staying power. Besides, you've always been kind enough to put up with our foolishness.
The older I get the less I'm willing to put up with the ignorance, selfishness, and foolishness that I see all around me with ever sharper eyes for such things. But I'm also more willing than I used to be to just overlook the weaknesses and shortcomings of others, as long as I don't have to hang around too long. Maybe I'm feeling more patient these days because I'm usually expecting ignorant, foolish, and selfish behavior. It may take a deep breath but I remind myself that there's no point getting agrivated. Locking horns with others is like wrestling with a pig. You both end up covered in mud and the pig actually enjoys it.
Sometimes I am even taken by surprise by expressions of kindness, thoughtfullness, wisdome, and generosity displayed by the ignorant, selfish fools around me. Maybe I appreciate these higher aspects of others more because I have become so keenly aware of their--and my--shortcomings. The contrast sharpens my appreciation.
Anyway, Val, you know we are all here for you and for each other. You showed a lot of guts putting yourself out there in your original post and I salute your honesty and admire your openness. To say nothing of the toughness you've displayed in dealing with all you've gone through these last few years.
--Speaking of foolishness, I am posting this without the benefit of a spell-checker. New computer...haven't had a chance to install Open Office yet. I apologize for all assaults I may have committed on the English language.
The older I get the less I'm willing to put up with the ignorance, selfishness, and foolishness that I see all around me with ever sharper eyes for such things. But I'm also more willing than I used to be to just overlook the weaknesses and shortcomings of others, as long as I don't have to hang around too long. Maybe I'm feeling more patient these days because I'm usually expecting ignorant, foolish, and selfish behavior. It may take a deep breath but I remind myself that there's no point getting agrivated. Locking horns with others is like wrestling with a pig. You both end up covered in mud and the pig actually enjoys it.
Sometimes I am even taken by surprise by expressions of kindness, thoughtfullness, wisdome, and generosity displayed by the ignorant, selfish fools around me. Maybe I appreciate these higher aspects of others more because I have become so keenly aware of their--and my--shortcomings. The contrast sharpens my appreciation.
Anyway, Val, you know we are all here for you and for each other. You showed a lot of guts putting yourself out there in your original post and I salute your honesty and admire your openness. To say nothing of the toughness you've displayed in dealing with all you've gone through these last few years.
--Speaking of foolishness, I am posting this without the benefit of a spell-checker. New computer...haven't had a chance to install Open Office yet. I apologize for all assaults I may have committed on the English language.
#65
Thread Starter
^^Not to worry. I did not see any assaults on the English language and I really appreciate the encouragement. In the few days since I posted my op I've been overwhelmed by the kindness and support exhibited by all of you. The times they are a'changing and I believe a lot of what I've felt has been felt by most of you as well. I do not feel alone!
#66
This is a lighthearted take on customer service, which is one of my impatient buttons. http://theoatmeal.com/comics/customer_service
#67
Thread Starter
I quote: "Your intestines will be my jump rope . . . your skull - my urinal". And Gene called it lighthearted. I've had those feelings. Customer service is a reallllly huge issue where folks seem to love to push my buttons. AAAAAARRRGGGGGHHHH
#68
#70
I find I just spend less time with others now. Sort of a lone wolf phase of life.