Lainey

I have one too.

It may sound cynical to some, but it works for me.

Lower your expectations and you won't be disappointed.

Another one: Less use of the word "should" in your vocabulary, may lead to less disappointments. People don't always (or in some cases often) do what we think they should.

dean

I've employed a scorched-earth policy when dealing with rather nasty family members. I instructed my half-sister to shove a dead porcupine up her arse and go die in a fire. She took the hint and I've heard nary a screech out of the spineless harpy since. However, you may want to adopt a more tactful approach in dealing with less than pleasant relatives.

valentine

+1 keeps telling me it is the constant grinding pain (even though its NOWHERE near where it was) that makes me more edgy, more emotional and less "kind" and forgiving. To some degree I agree with him, but I guess not being as able to participate in activities I once enjoyed, I have more time to reflect and think of all those times my siblings and other family members have been much less than kind to me, been snarky and petty, etc. All of the really big important things that have gone in my life for at least 20 or so years have been enjoyed without them. I don't think either of my sisters has even seen my 2nd S2000 and I've owned it since 2006. I've never been invited to huge family events where everyone in the family except me was invited for. They know little to nothing about my kids or things that happen in their lives . . . because they don't care. There is not a single one of my siblings that I have not helped out financially and never asked for a dime of my $$ back. I don't want it and always had the attitude that a loan to a family member should be considered a gift. I'm not an uber wealthy person and I certainly dug deep into the pot to help them out thinking if I ever needed them . . . you know the story. So, its done and I'm the better person for it all. I have a great little (very little) family and I'll not belabor these issues any further. Perhaps there has been a brain change, Morris. I'm not quite ready to accuse +1 of infidelity yet though. If anything I think he deserves a medal!

Tadashi

I like this one I am going to start implementing that more

Jerry I had no idea about the surgery - so glad you recovered

Tadashi

OMG this nearly caused a moment

Lainey

Morris, I think you've made a good point. Pain certainly can be a factor in personality changes. I saw it in my Dad when he was ill.

I know when I dealt with the shoulder issues I functioned, and got through each day, but I KNOW I was less than pleasant, I KNOW I wasn't the most fun person to be with and I'm sure I had a short string on many of those days. Sometimes I'd just go to bed and Chronic pain/illness does do a number on folks. When I finally started to feel like me again, it was an amazing feeling. I don't know how anyone deals with daily pain for years and years, I got off easy compared to so many.

Oh, and you are so right about the lack of filter in the older population. My Mom has come out with a few comments of late that made me

Headchef

Val, I agree 100%. especially about speaking up rather than tolerating shoddy products or service in todays world. These all certainly seem to be vintage related. Several years ago I attended a seminar by the late Earl Nightingale and have taken something he said that day to heart and recall it every time I experience one of these events. He said:" To stand by idly and do or say nothing or fail to notify the proper authority is to Sanction incompetence" Perhaps we all on a global level have been doing just that for far too long.

valentine

I think I'll watch the movie, Network again tonight. Its about time.

valentine

A huge thumbsup to all of you. Once again, I feel validated. I accept all of the comments you've made and am working on adopting a better attitude. I feel as if I've had a group hug.

Lainey

Val, it was a virtual one, but we all did this for you!