You can duct-tape my ex to your hood and the cops will think it's a whale coming down the road. Can they legally ticket a whale for speeding?

 

Only if they mistake her for a witch on a broomstick.

 

Witch = whale. Same thing in this case! EEEEWW!

 

naw you got it all wrong. Just drive your car normally and when you get caugh speeding, kick on the flux-capacitor and go back in time 20 minutes and tempt a 350z to race and have him blow through the cop radar :-P

that way your ticket-less and wickedly evil :-P