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Future headlines for the year 2035

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Old 04-15-2004 | 07:45 PM
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Default Future headlines for the year 2035

Headlines in the year 2035


"O"zone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, California.

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as California's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops & livestock.

Baby conceived naturally.... Scientists stumped.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria, and Lebanon.)

Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least ten more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesday only.

35 year study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters, and rolled up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

Congress authorizes direct deposit of illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75%.

Passengers going through Airport Checkpoints have been upgraded from Level "Nude Only" to Level "Shoes Only" as the 9/11 threat drops off.

Florida still don't know how to use a voting machine.
Old 04-15-2004 | 09:12 PM
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Old 04-15-2004 | 10:32 PM
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Good stufff
Old 04-15-2004 | 10:56 PM
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Old 04-16-2004 | 03:18 AM
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lol
Old 04-16-2004 | 05:27 AM
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Old 04-16-2004 | 09:31 AM
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Old 04-19-2004 | 05:05 AM
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How can Chelsea and Bush be president at the same time?
Old 04-19-2004 | 07:35 AM
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by Zangerzone
Headlines in the year 2035
Old 04-19-2004 | 07:46 PM
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or it could be "Czechoslofornia!"



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