My dog
09-26-2008, 08:27 PM
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My dog
Everyone who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Fido." I called mine "Sex." He's a great pal but he has caused me a great deal of embarrasment.
When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like one, too!"
Then I said, "But this is a dog." He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand, I've had Sex since I was 9 years old." He winked and said, "You must have been quite a kid."
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex.
He said, "You don't need a special room. As long as you pay your bill we don't care what you do." I said, "Look, you don't seem to understand, Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Funny I have the same problem."
One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there, looking disappointed. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets.
"But you don't understand," I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on TV." He said, "Now that cable is all over the place its no big deal anymore."
When my wife and I seperated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had sex before I was married." The judge said, "This courtroom isn't a confessional. Stick to the case, please."
The I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said that's not unusual. It happens to a lot of people.
Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came to me and asked, "What are you doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the mourning?" I told him I was looking for Sex. My case comes up next Friday.
Does anyone know a good attorney?
When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like one, too!"
Then I said, "But this is a dog." He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand, I've had Sex since I was 9 years old." He winked and said, "You must have been quite a kid."
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex.
He said, "You don't need a special room. As long as you pay your bill we don't care what you do." I said, "Look, you don't seem to understand, Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Funny I have the same problem."
One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there, looking disappointed. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets.
"But you don't understand," I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on TV." He said, "Now that cable is all over the place its no big deal anymore."
When my wife and I seperated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had sex before I was married." The judge said, "This courtroom isn't a confessional. Stick to the case, please."
The I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said that's not unusual. It happens to a lot of people.
Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came to me and asked, "What are you doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the mourning?" I told him I was looking for Sex. My case comes up next Friday.
Does anyone know a good attorney?
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