Rabbit Story #1:

Mrs. Raptor brought home this beautiful six month old Netherland Dwarf rabbit colored like a Siamese cat. Netherland Dwarfs are very small with short snouts and ears. Her rabbit expert friend who gave us this rabbit said it was a girl. So we named her Sonya after my secretary, who was Dutch Indonesian, visiting in Holland at the time, and had big brown eyes like the rabbit. Sonja thought she was a dog, was housebroken, came when you called her, and slept in the bed with us.

We had some friends who lived in Solana Beach that had a sailboat. We used to go sailing with them to Catalina Island all the time. They loved Sonya and got a boy rabbit, which they named Bibby after Henry Bibby, who was playing basketball for UCLA at the time. Bibby had a white patch on his chest like a bib. One time we took Sonya down to meet Bibby and go sailing. We found out within about three seconds that Sonya wasn't a girl and Bibby wasn't a boy. Mrs. Raptor was laughing so hard she was crying. Sonya became Isaac. Isaac lived to the ripe old age of nine. He died when we moved into our current house -- the move was too much for the little guy..

Rabbit Stort #2:

Shortly after we moved into our new house, some kids down the street sort of adopted us. They raised Netherland dwarf rabbits. One day they showed up with these tiny 2 1/2 week old bunnies in a blanket. We said "We'll take that one," a dark gray little guy with a white chest and feet. They said "OK, but they won't be weaned until they're eight weeks." Well, the next Friday evening I came home from work to find this tiny little bunny hopping around on the kitchen table. Mrs. Raptor said "They declared him weaned." I made myself a short drink of Jack Daniels on the rocks and set it down on the table. The rabbit started drinking it! He wasn't supposed to be weaned from his mother's milk until eight weeks and at 3 1/2 weks he was drinking whiskey. Of course, we named him JD. He also thought he was a dog and slept in the bed with us.

Mrs. Raptor's best friend moved to Chicago and gave us her cat, Jamaica, a 25 pound ass kicking guy. We had a Blue Jay who used to dive bomb and torment all the cats in the neighborhood. On day one, Jamaica ate the Blue Jay. Jamaica then proceeded to kick the crap out of all the cats in the neighborhood. Then he tangled with a possum -- and lost. Well, JD really had Jamaica's number. He was just a little bit bigger than Jamaica's head, but he used to chase Jamaica around. He once chased him up a tree. JD also lived to be nine. Then one day, chasing the cat, he ran headfirst into a metal bedpost. That was the end of JD.

Rabbit Stort #3:

Then we got a really little Netherland dwarf baby bunny that was cream colored with a black nose and ears. He loved to climb up things and pissed a lot (housebroken). Since he always went up and made water, we named him Archimedes after the Archimedes Screw. This was quickly shortened to Archie. Archie was a real charmer. He also slept in the bed with us and thought he was a dog. People would come over to visit us, but they really wanted to see Archie. Unfortunately, he had some congenital birth defect and died at nine months. We were very sad.

 

God but sad stories RB...

 

Phew, you guys go through a lot of rabbits.

Still sad though, but you do put a humourous twist on them nonetheless.

 

GREAT STORIES RB! But I think Im gonna have to extend my stay in LA if you start gettin into stories while Im there J/K

 

Good stuff George!

 

OK, The raptor's theory on rabbits: Think about it -- in what settings have you ever encountered rabbits? (1) in the wild, where you cannot make close contact, observation, or interaction and (2) in cages, where their personalityes are stifled and their bodies are atrophied -- rabbits like to run! Pretend you were from outer space, conducting a survey of the human race, and your sample consisted of (1) the Tadasay in the rainforest highlands of New Guinea who are (at least until recently) still in the Stone Age and (2) people in prison. What kinds of conclusions would you draw about the human race? My considerable observation is that rabbits are much more intelligent, personable, communicative, and clever that people give them credit for.

 

And good for the BBQ

BEER-BUTT RABBIT

2 whole rabbit, about 3 pounds each
1 tablespoon sweet paprika
2 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon oregano
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 tablespoon packed brown sugar
2 12 oz. cans beer
1 small onion diced
2 cloves garlic diced

Rinse inside and out, pat dry. In small bowl, combine spices and sugar, mix well. Rub 1 teaspoon of mixture on inside of each rabbit. Rub remaining mixture on rabbit's surface. Open beer can and pour off about half of the beer. Stuff onion and garlic into cans. Ease rabbit over beer cans, feet down, until rabbit is resting on can and legs. Cans must remain upright at all times. Add a handful of soaked hickory chips to the hot charcoal (optional). Place rabbit and beer cans on grill and close lid, leave vents open. Grill for 2 hours, or until legs wiggle easily. Add six to eight briquettes to fire every 30 minutes.
Serves 8.

 

:rofl

I knew it wouldn't be long until someone put a recipe in here ....

 

E Ticket-

you, asshole!!!!!

 

Thanks