JOKE OF THE DAY !
08-08-2005, 07:43 PM
#31
Registered User
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Sutherland Shire
Posts: 5,722
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
A piece of String walks into a bar ... the bar tender see's him and says... we dont serve piece's of string here .... so the piece of string goes outside and ties himself into a knott.... walks back in and the bar tender yells out ... "hey ! arent you that peice of string in here a mintue ago ? and the strings yells back "No im knott" !
09-03-2005, 05:19 PM
#38
Registered User
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Melbourne, Vic, Australia
Posts: 3,393
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been
changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the
light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light
bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6
to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is
"lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light
bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take
this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light
bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to
buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this
technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the
corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to
this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including
all
headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they
cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions
about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and
start it all over again.
_________________
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been
changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the
light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light
bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6
to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is
"lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light
bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take
this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light
bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to
buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this
technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the
corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to
this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including
all
headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they
cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions
about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and
start it all over again.
_________________
10-16-2005, 10:32 PM
#40
Registered User
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Sutherland Shire
Posts: 5,722
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
A man and a woman, who have never met before, but are both married to
other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a
Transcontinental train.
Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were
both very tired and fell asleep quickly... he in the upper bunk and she
in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned over
and gently woke the woman saying,
"Ma'am,
I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the
closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend
that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
"Good," she replied.
"Get your own blanket!"
After a moment of silence, he Farted
other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a
Transcontinental train.
Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were
both very tired and fell asleep quickly... he in the upper bunk and she
in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned over
and gently woke the woman saying,
"Ma'am,
I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the
closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend
that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
"Good," she replied.
"Get your own blanket!"
After a moment of silence, he Farted